Another Letter to an Inanimate Object






Dear Hair,

Hey there! Now I know that you’ve heard me let a few comments about you come flying outa my mouth and into the world around us. And at the time, I’m sure they seemed justified. Comments about how I was neither blessed with curly or straight hair, but some void in between that I can only call “frizziness”. Hair that had to be “done” in some way in order to leave the house with even an ounce of what girly dignity I have, intact. I have cut, died, permed, re-cut, fried with straighteners, curled into a monstrosity, pulled into piggy-tails, braided it into 6-year-old up-do’s, and left it limp and hanging for the sake of “letting my hair down”, all in the past year and a half. Some attempts have been successful, others, epic failures. But wasn’t it fun to try something new??? No, huh?

But with all that done and said, I still love you. I even like you on days like today (sans wind and humidity). Gosh, I totally love you today! If all my hair days were this good, I’d never say a negative thing about you (out loud).

So now that you know that I am tolerant of you, will you please stop falling out?

I mean, c’mon! There’s nothing I’ve said or done that could warrant you moving out! Look, I shower regularly, I comb and brush and treat you with goodies to keep the heat off of you, I try to utilize our modern science and take advantage of shampoos and conditioners that are “specially balanced” for YOUR type, and yet, you are just leaving me here in a lurch.

Maybe it was the surgery, or perhaps it was the pregnancy, or perhaps the stress of BOTH in such a short time. Because I can understand all the confusion, and stress and fear and I’m pretty sure I didn’t care one whit about you during that time…but leaving? Now? It’s just not worth it!

Tell ya what…you stop what you’re doing right now and I won’t be mad. PLUS I’ll talk you up a few times around people who don’t like their hair. How does that sound? I think that I am being more than fair and that you should jump at the chance to stay on my head.

Thanks so much for considering this arrangement (it’s your ONLY option, I promise)

Love (LOTS of it!!)


See Hair? I totally love you!

One thought on “Another Letter to an Inanimate Object

  1. You look great no matter how your hair looks. Even if you were bald i would still love you. Papa Neal

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